What age do you talk to your kids?

[Frankie Goes to Hollywood]

I have a 16 year old and an 11 year old. I want them to be educated about the facts of life and how to protect themselves, but don't feel comfortable talking to them at their young ages, especially the youngest one.

Any thoughts on this?

[getSTDtested Administrator]

Well, talking to your kids is really important. Even the younger one. The conversations will be different though, try to think of age-appropriate discussions for your children. The most important thing is to be prepared for the conversation, let them know the risks involved in sex and how they can protect themselves (both physically and emotionally...it's important that your children know to respect themselves and be respected by their partner in relationships). The goal in your "talk" with your kids (both the 16 and 11 year old) is to let them know that they can trust you, that they can ALWAYS come to you with any questions or problems they may have and that you'll always support them. This is hard for young teens. Your parents aren't always the people you'd want to go to first, especially when it comes to sex, but if you have opened the lines of communication with your children, then you're already doing what it takes to be a great parents and to protect your children. I hope this helps and please let me know if you have any other questions.

I recommend reading around the rest of this "Talk To Your Teens" forum as well...we have a lot of visitors in your same situation who's posts may be able to help you a great deal!

[Giggles]

I think it's really important to take young people very, very seriously when they ask anything about sex. Even if they seem cute and naive, don't laugh of make them think you're talking down. If you do, they won't ask again and you both might miss good opportunities.

I was never able to talk with my mom and dad and, I swear, I was one of those who learned it on the street, you know. That's no way to learn about sex! And of course "the street" doesn't talk about unwanted pregnancy, safer sex, or anything like that. If nothing else, get some literature and give them and let them know you're there, and won't judge them or be harsh. That would have opened the door for me, but God love my folks they (and I, too) just didn't know how to deal.

[Erich Remarque]

If you need STD facts and figures to answer questions your kids might have (or, for that matter, questions you might have!) look on this site at Disease FAQ's & Info Pages - Confidential STD Testing &amp Private On-line Results.

For more on effectively talking with kids, take a look at ASHA's guide for parents at I Wanna Know: Sexual health and you.

[Victoriana]

Give them honest, accurate info about what can happen. Not a scare tactic, just the truth. STDS are rampant, most don't have signs or symptoms, you simply must use protection, and get tested (especially if you're a girl under 25 who's having sex).

Disease FAQ's & Info Pages - Confidential STD Testing &amp Private On-line Results on this site will cover the facts.